Getting Back the Wonder

I love to watch my children. They embrace so much with such abandon. To hear their voices as they create the plot lines for their game is delightful. It brings me so much joy that sometimes it is difficult to keep it contained. I know that to them, their play is very serious business, and if I do not take it seriously could cause them embarrassment. I want them to know that I value it, too. But sometimes it is too wonderful to keep inside, and a grin spreads across my face.

They are so free. They run and sing and jump and climb on a whim. There is no half living. It is everything, their complete focus on the thing at hand, or they are sleeping. There are no ulterior motives. If they pick a flower for me, it is simply because they thought it was beautiful and wanted to see me smile. That is enough to them. It is such an example to me.

And there is their curiosity and fascination. They are continually finding things to bring me. "Mom, come see this!" is commonly heard echoing in our house. We have seen chipmunks, red squirrels, snow geese, rabbits, redwing blackbirds, swallows, turkeys, humming birds, 4 different kinds of frogs, toads, dragonflies, butterflies, interesting beetles, turkey vultures, a salamander, and so many other kinds of birds I can't name yet. I find myself now looking for things to show them, to keep that fascination alive. As I do that, it has stirred up my own curiosity again. Their awe of the world is so prevalent. We take pictures of the sunsets nearly every night, because they are so beautiful.

I have been finding that while I am raising my children, that I do not so much change them. They are who they are, and come with their own gifts and challenges that I am simply here to help them navigate.

But they continually refine me. They show me what I have lost since childhood, and how to regain it. They help me to see what areas I have not yet developed in my character. Or what needs more time and attention.

They are such examples of forgiveness and unconditional love, they so quickly move on from whatever mistakes I may make. It is helping me with self-acceptance, compassion, forgiveness and love.

They have such innocence, and see such good in the world. It has helped me to remember how much good there still is, in a world where it is so easy to become jaded. It gives me so much hope.

They have taught me about emotional healing, as I see their outreaching hands and warm smiles break down barriers in hearts of people I love and I did not know how to reach.

In learning about how to develop my relationships with them, it has taught me about relating to everyone. That has improved my marriage 10 fold.

As I watch my children's wonder of the world around them, it stirs that wonder within me. Something that had been dormant. But it also brings a new wonder. They are miracles, each of them. And they have brought miracles to my life. They have changed me, now and forever, in ways that I can never express.

And that brings me so much wonder and awe.